“Wow! We didn’t see that one coming. After all hadn’t he said, ‘…only 4 months recovery?'”
Last time I wrote I mentioned re-booking our Hawaii trip; which I did:)))
And then: Re-booking and canceling (again) all in one fell swoop of a weeks time left me more than a little depressed:(((
This is one of the reasons I haven’t posted here let alone written anything worth mentioning since my last entry in October.
It had been only 2 days after my last posting as well as our re-booking of above mentioned trip to Hawaii, when on October 8th Skip and I went to see Dr. Peng. We were full of excitement as we thought he would be releasing me to start walking with my boot! But my appointment left us shocked and so very disappointed (again).
An extra long time at the docs office, complete with a dressing down by Dr. Peng about how “We just heard what we wanted to hear” and “I know I told you your recovery would be a full 6 months till you would wear both your shoes again,” left me so very done with my plight.
Honestly with Skip and I always, the both of us at the appointments listening one for the other, (so we wouldn’t miss anything He told us) still to this day has us believing it truly was the good docs mistake that led us to believing that I could walk and snorkel my way through the beautiful land and waters of Maui this coming January 2015 and to re-booking the trip!
But it was not to be. No matter who said what or heard what, it doesn’t change the fact that as of today we do not have that wonderful and much-needed trip planned.
And on top of my ankle issue since I last wrote, we have had some other disappointing news that will keep us (even after I am released) from re-re-booking our trip for who knows how long:(((
As the Summer has turned into Fall it has also become cooler in more ways than one. And my sadness has been the blanket I’ve tried to use to keep me warm.
I’ve tried this whole time since breaking my ankle this past August 4th to stay in a good mood. Trying to be positive and look for the productive reasons I am in this situation. Trying to stubbornly “figure it all out on my own.”
Unfortunately sadness and depression aren’t really very comforting or warm. And they both end up turning into an ugly expression of who a person really is. One that can stick like crazy glue to ones mind and thought processes. And these two emotions certainly melded my senses and sensibilities.
Today as I was spending my daily quiet time with my Lord Jesus, I read a Proverb in my Bible that I don’t remember ever running across before. It reads:
“If you get more stubborn every time you are corrected, one day you will be crushed and NEVER RECOVER.” Proverbs 29:1 Good News Bible
And if that wasn’t alarming enough personally someone else came to my mind as I read this. As I thought about this person and the particular situation it rocked my thinking. I envisioned this person NEVER getting this Truth; and what would happen in their life because of it. It is scary and devastating to say the least!!!
While that particular scenario is extreme to think about, there are circumstances and issues that are present everyday that if we don’t change our minds about, could just as easily set a course for the “Too Late Land” of ……! You fill in the blank.
I don’t know what your sticking point is nor do I know how many you have; but I look back and see the possibility: That Skip and I did only “hear what we wanted to hear” way back in the beginning of my ankle saga.
And I can now see how differently I might have felt and acted had we based our plans on that truth.
For that I can only speculate, but based on my stubbornness in playing the victim recently, I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that if I hadn’t just days ago given God my thought life; (again), asking Him to clearly show me the errors of my ways about issues that had come up, that I would have set myself up to never recover emotionally and possibly figuratively as well!
Having gone through this type of surrendering in my past I read that scripture and quickly repented, because I know it is in giving up your “my way or the highway” attitude is the ONLY righteous way to go. It is the ONLY way that reaps peaceful rewards.
I have seen the bottom of “Woe-is-Me Well” several times and I have been at the peak of “Sober and Sane Mountain” too and I’m here still today because I keep choosing God’s path and not what my stupid head tells me!!
I might not be in Hawaii or anywhere other than my couch much, but I feel the peace of mind and heart that comes from following God to the freedom that comes ONLY from following His paths.
If your life isn’t the life you want now, take a look at your own thoughts. Are they sticking in stubbornness? Are you still trying to do it all in your own way? What are the results? Do you feel the peace that ONLY choosing Gods path can bring or not?
If not maybe this is unfortunately waiting for you:
“Whoever stubbornly refuses to accept criticism will suddenly be destroyed beyond recovery.” Proverbs 20:1 New Living Translation
“For people who hate discipline and only get more stubborn, there’ll come a day when life tumbles in and they break; but by then it’ll be too late to help them.” Proverbs 29:1 The Message Bible
If so, please choose today to turn to the God who determined you to be born and created you to live a life that ONLY works when you work it HIS WAY! Review your life past and present. Ask God to reveal to you those times you are stubbornly self involved only thinking of the path YOU want to take or stay on. Think of the things you ruminate and relent over. These are the things He wants you to let loose of.
Do so before that day comes when your sticking point takes you to the brink of that “No Return Land.”
Ask Jesus in His name to help you out of your “Woe-is-Me Well.” He will do it! Ask Him to show you the way you should go and the right answers will be there. You WILL be blessed and happy for it! Gods peace is only a surrender away.
“And it is so…. very well with my soul!”